The Office, My Office #9: Dwight Christmas

EPISODE 9.09: DWIGHT CHRISTMAS
Having forgotten to plan the office Christmas party, the Party Planning Committee decides to let Dwight throw a traditional Pennsylvania Dutch Christmas. Meanwhile in the Annex, Pete (AKA the new Jim) discovers that Erin has never seen Die Hard, a movie that he has completely memorized.

Where do I even begin?

Let’s start in the Annex. We have someone like Pete – someone who can essentially recite a movie from beginning to end. Unlike Pete, though, our guy knows more than Die Hard. It’s a little Rain Man-esque how much our guy knows about movies, both the mainstream and the obscure. And it’s not like he’s memorized these movies because he’s seen them many times. It’s more like he has an uncanny memory for all things film. You can randomly mention any movie, and if he’s seen it at least once, you can expect a complete retelling of the entire story. If you’re lucky, he might do voices. Just watch out for spoilers.

Back at the party, Dwight is dressed as Belsnickel, a German version of Santa Claus described on Wikipedia as “a crotchety, fur-clad Christmas gift-bringer figure.” Dwight filled a punch bowl with wine that tastes like lava and can be used to sterilize medical instruments. As Jim and Pam check out the table of food, they come across a mysterious meatloaf-looking dish. “Somebody’s found the hog maw!” Dwight exclaims. WAIT. What did he say? Did he say “hog maw” or “hog maul”? Because one is a dish made of pig stomach and the other, Hogmaul, is an independent horror movie for which two of my coworkers have done some behind-the-scenes work…

Okay, it’s starting to get creepy. Which one of my coworkers is secretly a writer for The Office?

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